Routine 1

Cheerios? Not one of those O's has a right to be cheery. They're all gonna be drowned, then eaten.

I'm a traditional one-liner comedian- I like to make sure my jokes don't go over one line, so sometimes I have to type in a really small font and remove punctuation.

If companies want to reduce their carbon footprint, they should stop employing workers with carbon shoes.

Anime is essentially justifying adults watching cartoons, but watching anime has a lot of its own stigma attached, so sometimes when people ask what I've been doing, I tell them I've been watching a lot of drawings, really quickly.

Thanks, folks. You've been great.

TheSovietChairman